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Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?"

It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it?  After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with.

But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it.

Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone.

While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts.

Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them.

So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an introvert would be amenable to them.

I crave solitude all the more after a busy day at work or social function that involves incessant small talk. Introverts become energized by conversations that revolve around deep subjects ranging from economics to science.

Still, there are times where we prefer our own company to that of other people, like-minded or otherwise. And you know what? There's nothing wrong with that.

Society has a nasty habit of making us feel like we're weirdos for wanting alone time. But this couldn't be further from the truth.

A person might see someone by themselves-- say, sitting on a bench at the park -- and think, "That poor fellow must be lonely." But being alone and feeling lonely are completely different. The former is something people can seek out and enjoy; the latter usually carries a negative connotation.

People seek solitude in varying degrees depending on their personality and other factors. No one should ever put anyone else down for wanting too much or too little of it.

Whether you want to call it introversion, solitude, or Isolophilia, a person's need for solitude should be respected. Some people don't realize how beneficial it is for others -- and could be for themselves.

Had you ever heard of Isolophilia before? Have you ever had such a deep need for solitude before?

Comments

Unknown said…
When the base stones for ones life is laid with people the architecture depends completely on one's own decisions. While we prefer to comment solitude to a state of being alone, solitude is that chance to recall, review and remind us of what we are, what we can, and what we should. As it is said that speaking to one's own self gives the best solutions, being solitary at times is necessary to read upon ourselves of what we are.
Unknown said…
I am an ENFP - an extrovert, but one who flips into the Introverted spectrum reguarly. I am also an isolophiliac. I crave massive amounts of time alone. My default personality is extroverted - but I never feel bored or lonely when I am alone. Your statements about extroverted personalities are a bit limited when juxtaposed to my own experience. I am also a performance artist and musician - to which end my extroversion serves a strong purpose. But in order to do this - I need massive massive amounts of time in total seclusion. It makes it possible for me to recharge my extro batteries.
The more intelligent or empathetic the extrovert, the more energy it takes away from them when they are employing their extroverted personality skills. The more this behavior drains the individual, the more time they need unwinding while completely alone in a comfortable cave somewhere hidden underground.
Bonty said…
Yes ..being an introvert makes us feel everything and feels like had we interacted with world properly ???
Whatever we are stressful at any situation we want only one common thing that fulfill the whole situation ...
Unknown said…
I feel as if I am a Sight Specific Extrovert and an Introvert the rest of the time.I Enjoy being around like minded people,but have little tolerance for small talk and Unintelligent people..To Quote Charles Bukowski. .It's not that I don't like people,I just feel so much better when they are not around.
Unknown said…
Hello, My name is Kristie.. An I definitely have isolophilia.. I really enjoy my alone time.. It might be from the fact that I'm an only child. Or I'm just tired of the world being so cold..either way I love to be alone. It gives me a chance to go within. An ask myself questions an learn me more
Anonymous said…
I love being alone. Over the years, I have tried to analyze why I feel this way, thinking something was wrong with me. I've wondered if it has anything to do with being the "middle child"? First child gets lots of attention. Third one (in my situation came along nine years later) gets lots of attention because they are the new baby. Middle child learns to live without any special attention and gets lost in the middle to entertain themselves. Another idea I had was my mother and I clashed from the day I was born...I guess it was our personalities colliding. So, I learned early on, it was better to stay out of her way as much as possible because I knew I would never be able to please her. Whatever the case, I became very comfortable with being alone and found that I actually enjoy my own company, my thoughts and not having to weigh my every word to please others. It's nice to know there are other people that enjoy being alone and that it is OK.

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