People are more interested in you when...

Many people show more interest in other people when they're not around than when they are.

We all have that coworker who may not talk to us for days at work, but somehow they notice when we're not there and proceed to inquire about it.

Many of us have been in a relationship where the other person takes us for granted -- until we begin to show signs of getting fed up and cease putting in as much time and effort.

Then there's the friend who only seems to care about the friendship once you've stopped calling and visiting them.

If we want people to appreciate us, we have no choice but to force them to invest time and effort in us too -- not just the other way around. By doing so, the individual realizes that if they're taking their spare time to do something for us, they must truly care about us.

The tendency to take others for granted is a theme I've broached in myriad posts on the blog.

I understand that we get busy, and being unable to answer every call or text message isn't unusual.

But most of us can tell the difference between someone who's busy and someone who flat-out couldn't care if you're around or not. What's more, the ones who eventually do ask about you might be doing it out of sheer nosiness more than anything else.

As I've said so many times before, a solid relationship requires the time and effort of both parties.  You shouldn't feel as though you have to carry all the weight on your shoulders. If that's the case, the relationship is headed for turbulent waters.

Sometimes, all it takes to make someone or something more valuable in people's eyes is the prospect of loss. Whether it's realizing that a coworker's resignation is imminent or that one's partner is about to walk out the door, the feeling (or fear) of losing a person can be quite powerful.

I'm not saying you should threaten to leave, but let it be known that you will not be taken for a ride. Once people realize this, they'll earn a new level of respect for you and likely change their unappreciative ways.

1 comment:

Priscilla King said...

I wish it worked in cyberspace!