A person whose words have been shown to contradict his or her actions is one you're better off without.
Maybe it's the girlfriend who professes to love you but always misses your milestone moments.
The friend who talks up your being best buddies, but has been caught spreading lies about you.
The co-worker who assures you that you can always count on them, but is furtively angling for your job.
The truth is that it's not always easy to decipher people's real motives, especially when you don't know them that well.
But once you observe on more than one occasion that their actions don't mirror their words, you ought to cast a wary eye.
People can make promises all they like, but if there's no action to back them up, it's evident they've got a penchant for disingenuousness.
Don't be too quick to hand over your trust. We are much more apt to do this when the person in question is charming and charismatic.
A rule of thumb to go by: You don't really know a person well until at least a year has gone by. By then, you should have a better idea whether he or she seems is dependable.
Of course, this isn't always guaranteed.
How many stories of men leading a second life have we come across? It often doesn't come to light until the pair has been dating for 10 or so years.
Nobody's perfect. Do we all lie sometimes? Of course. Do our actions jibe with our words each and every day? Nope.
However, there's a subset of individuals who've made an art form out of this practice. They have absolutely no moral sensibilities.
If you find yourself with someone and allow the behavior to persist, you're simply enabling them.
We should all strive to ensure our words are in agreement with our actions. Otherwise, we put our jobs and relationships at risk when the other person grows tired of the routine.
So, what can people do to make this happen?
1. Don't make promises if you know you can't deliver.
2. Don't withhold things from your loved ones.
3. Don't try to be someone you're not, especially at the outset.
4. Don't feign interest in something if it's not your cup of tea. Be open and honest.
The above just scream "deception," which can undermine the trust someone has for you.
You want people in your life who are unapologetically genuine and pure -- the kind who look after you, don't always tell you what you want to hear, and demonstrate their love, respect, and/or attention through simple deeds.
Remember, there's no better a companion in life who says what they mean and means what they say.
Be honest, open, and transparent. Not only will it make for a more balanced life, but it will help to weed out the ones who fail to return that behavior in kind.
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