Never let anyone disrespect you

We were all taught back in grade school that we ought to treat others with the same level of respect that we expect in return. Or so I thought.

Sadly, some of today's adults were either absent when the lesson was taught, or it fell entirely on deaf ears.

I've run across many people -- whether in school, the workplace, or elsewhere -- who think this so-called Golden Rule doesn't apply to them. They believe they have agency to treat others like dirt -- all while expecting those very people to shower them with kindness and civility.

This plays out all the time at work with toxic bosses who go on unrestrained power trips. They think that just because they possess the ability to fire their subordinates, they should be groveled to. In their minds, expletives are fair game and borderline abusive behavior is permissible.

A similar dynamic can be observed in some relationships. Whether it's because they're better looking, far wealthier, or more socially connected, some individuals think they can run roughshod over their partner while demanding unvarnished loyalty and respect.

You'd probably agree that the preceding examples make the victims -- let's call them what they are -- seem like animals being flogged by an unfeeling tormentor. And that's precisely what it is.

Last I checked, nobody has a patent on respect. Wanting respect without giving it is about as hypocritical as it gets. In my view, people with this disposition are morally bankrupt. Among the types who typically fit this profile are narcissists and psychopaths. Perhaps they were subjected to the same treatment as children, so they don't know any better.

Still, this isn't a valid excuse. If you want to cultivate healthy relationships and earn the esteem of others, respecting them is a mere entry point. If the relationship is devoid of respect, how do you expect to inspire trust? Loyalty? Compassion?

If you find yourself being disrespected, you need to put a stop to the behavior before it escalates into abuse. You could try defusing the situation by having a heart-to-heart talk. If that fails and the behavior continues, you'll have to seriously consider whether leaving the job or relationship is the best avenue to pursue.

Comments

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