Skip to main content

Cut ties with hurtful, toxic people

Woman alone

It isn't always easy to kiss someone in your life goodbye. When it comes to toxic folks who put our happiness at risk, however, it should be a no brainer. 

Naturally, we want to surround ourselves with individuals who make us laugh, help us grow, and stand by us in good times and bad ones. 

But it's inevitable that, along the way, we will encounter some rotten eggs -- those who seemingly can't bear the thought of anyone but them being happy. 

Jettison people in your life who are corrosive to your physical, mental, and emotional well-being.

Whether it's a friend, partner, relative, or acquaintance, there is no place in your orbit for somebody who's bent on making you miserable.

Life is too short for that, and you deserve better.

I've have had to sever ties with friends -- or so I thought they were friends -- who ended up turning against me. 

Perhaps they were jealous of my good grades or other friends whom they felt threatened by. Whatever the reason, I pulled the plug before things could get really ugly. 

I'm all for trying to work things out before putting the kibosh on the relationship. 

But if you find that respect, loyalty, kindness, and communication are sorely lacking despite your best efforts, it may be time to shut the door on this one. 

The only good things that can come out of a toxic relationship are: 

  • Building the strength and resilience to stand your ground against them and similar folks who may cross your path later on
  • Zeroing in on the qualities you'd expect in a partner or friend going forward 
  • Others seeing their true colors emerge and kicking them to the curb as well
  • The satiafaction of finally breaking free 
Although you may resent ever having met the person, you should never regret a relationship that you learned from, or that brought you happiness at one point.

Relationships change, as do the people in them. Unless you played a role in the breakdown of relations, you shouldn't blame yourself. Instead, learn from the experience and look forward to forging new, better relationships. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is  still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it?  After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually.  Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker.  Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar.  When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca...