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Has someone hurt you like this? (Warning: It's painful.)

Cheat relationship

Has anyone ever told you you're the only one for them -- that they vow to be faithful to you for the rest of your lives -- only to turn around and cheat on you?

Few things could be as devastating. 

Imagine that: Someone who you envisioned spending the rest of your life with shattering your trust so egregiously.

The fact of the matter is that they were never being sincere about how they felt. Because when someone truly loves you, they wouldn't dare jeopardize the bond you share -- let alone by cheating.

And none of these count as justifiable:

  • Drinking too much
  • Being stressed at work
  • Being seduced 
  • Feeling unhappy in the relationship 
You don't go around canoodling with other men or women when something is awry in the relationship or, more generally, in your life. You make your partner aware of it so they can help you. You communicate. You discuss your options. 

If you see the relationship as no longer bringing you fulfillment, you either agree to seek counseling with your partner, or you end the relationship before betraying his or her trust.

And in case you're not sure what constitutes cheating, here's a rule of thumb to go by: If you don't feel comfortable telling your wife about something you've done with another man or woman, you've likely crossed a line. 

Cheaters are selfish in myriad ways. Not only do they fail to take their partner's feelings into account while cheating, but many opt to remain tight-lipped because they want the cake and they want to eat it too.

A cheater's logic: I don't want my relationship to go down the tubes, but if I can get a little something on the side, it's the best of both worlds! In fact, if either my serious relationship or side relationship falters, I'll have a back-up. 

Life doesn't work that way. 

The victim deserves to know what's transpired so that they can decide whether they wish to try and salvage the relationship (I wouldn't blame them for not wanting to) or move on. They deserve that much. 

And cheaters will only add fuel to the fire by blaming their partner for the infidelity (e.g., claiming they were driven to cheat by their partner's behavior).

Even if the partner has fumbled in some way, two wrongs don't make a right. And seeking retribution by straying is a despicable way to go about it. 

Can't you exhibit some class by first breaking up with your partner and then running off into the arms of the other man or woman?

Before committing this relationship transgression, a person should ask themselves these questions:

  • Would I want this done to me?
  • Is it really worth it to risk throwing my relationship away for a few nights of fun with someone else? 
  • Would I be able to bear the thought of seeing my partner with someone else if he or she refuses to take me back?
Thinking it through may very well deter some from going any further as they gain a renewed appreciation for their partner. 

But as we know, that's the best-case scenario (and quite often, the least probable) scenario.

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