Why people take us for granted

Isn't it terrible when someone you care about takes you for granted?

It could be a partner, a friend, or even a relative who:

Turns to you only when they need something
Leaves you in the lurch when you're in a rough patch yourself
Insists they will change, but they never do
Seems to prioritize everyone in his or her life except you

No matter how often you convey that you feel angry, hurt, and taken advantage of, they carry on with the behavior, assuming that you're going to stick around.

Their reasoning is: If you haven't left already, why would you now?

This is precisely the kind of mindset that causes so many relationships to go under.

Some people expect the other person to do all the work, thinking that alone will sustain the relationship.

Or, they may do a little here and there, but never commit themselves to the degree the other person is.

Sooner or later, the person being taken for a ride gives up and moves on. In certain cases, the other individual may feel a deep sense of guilt and apologize for what they've done.

In others, though (as many of us know all too well), they might not care enough to do even that.

Those who go through this kind of ordeal, I hope, come away having learned a valuable lesson: That they're just as deserving of love, respect, and attention as the person receiving theirs.

It's important to communicate early into the relationship that you expect them to reciprocate the effort.

If you're having a bad day and need an ear, or simply want to bounce some ideas off of them, they should at least be gracious enough to let you know when they might be able to set some time aside for you.

Otherwise, they will assume they can just take and take without having to contribute anything themselves.

Let's face it: Some people are flat-out selfish, some don't realize what they have until they've lost it, and still others are simply apathetic.

You can't allow others to have the cake and eat it too.

Don't waste your time and energy on anyone who deems you unworthy of theirs.

Comments

Anonymous said…

I think you are right. I dont need to waste my energy for the people who dont see my worth. I can shine without them. I be happy without their help. We must learn the art of Let go. It is indeed powerful to trust yourself without being taking for granted. They need to learn. They need to realize that being good relationship is more better than taking advantage of one another.

December 5, 2021 at 12:27 PM

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