In case you're not certain what it means: When one questions whether the grass is greener on the other side, they contemplate if there are better options out there for them.
And, of course, one will never know if the grass is greener -- if circumstances will in fact be more favorable -- unless they take a particular course of action. So a certain element of risk is certainly involved.
There are two primary areas where we are confronted with the grass is greener dilemma: jobs and relationships.
1. Jobs: Most of us do not detest our jobs per se, but from time to time, we wonder whether there is something better out there for us.
Perhaps we have outgrown our current role and picture ourselves in a higher position, earning more money and receiving better benefits. Or maybe we envision working for a better boss, or at a bigger company, or in a different industry altogether.
We can each cite at least a few perks our present jobs afford us, but gradually we may grow so accustomed to them that we start to set our sights on what we perceive as lacking.
2. Relationships: For all the love you have for your partner, there may be certain things you wish you could change. If you had it your way, he would be a great dancer or cook. Or maybe she'd be a little less messy or more athletic.
There are times -- especially when the relationship becomes stale or partners become mired in conflict -- where people may question whether they're with the right person, or if Mr. or Mrs. Right is still out there.
It doesn't necessarily mean they want to break up, but they still wonder whether someone else might enrich your life in ways your significant other might not.
How Grass is Greener Syndrome Can Backfire
In certain situations, acting on the syndrome may actually pay off.
For example, if you were grossly underpaid or disrespected by your boss at work, it's hard to imagine the situation getting any worse someplace else. In such a scenario, seeing the grass as greener may very well propel you to find a better work environment where you're compensated fairly and treated well.
The same applies to relationships where one is being cheated on or taken for granted. Who wouldn't picture themselves in a better relationship with someone else once they've tried everything in their power to salvage their current one?
But things become murkier when the situation isn't as bleak. Maybe we're just comfortable and stagnant. Sure, we have a bad day here and there, but we don't necessarily want to call it quits. Still, we mull over other possibilities, asking ourselves whether soon it will be time to test the job or dating market.
In that case, perhaps making a few changes can give your job or relationship a much-needed jolt.
Maybe you can ask your boss for a raise or more challenging projects, which will in turn revive the motivation you've lost over time.
Or, your relationship could use a shot of spontaneity, with you and your partner making a conscious effort to do new things (e.g., travel) to break the routine.
Unfortunately, some people press the panic button too quickly, later realizing that they've walked into an even worse situation than they were in before.
Understandably, you'll never know for sure what awaits you on the other side until you jump over. But such a decision carries risk. If it turns out that you've made a mistake and wish to go back to that prior job or relationship, it may be too late.
The Bottom Line
It's important we aim to put things in perspective and not make any hasty decisions. I always recommend my readers draw up a list of pros and cons to guide them.
It's easy to become so focused on the bad that you neglect to consider all the good stuff you may lose if you go for that new job or relationship.
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