Relationships don't die of natural causes

Relationships don't die a natural death.

Their demise is brought on by selfishness, lies, neglect, and a lack of compassion and consideration toward one's partner.

In some relationships, only one partner is responsible for causing a rift, and in others, both partners are to blame.

Unfortunately, some people expect their partner to do all the heavy lifting, leaving the other physically, mentally, and emotionally drained and effectively running the relationship into the ground.

If people don't want to do their fair share, why enter into a relationship at all?

A relationship is a partnership between two individuals. Both of them invest in, maintain, and enhance the relationship so that each feels they're not just reaping benefits, but dispensing them to the other as well.

In most cases, both partners put in comparable effort in the early stages of dating as they're getting to know one another.

It's when complacency begins to set in that things get hairy. One person might start to coast while the other continues to go out of their way to please their partner.

Before you know it, the former is selfishly out to do whatever they please, completely indifferent to his or her partner's feelings. Lying and finger-pointing only serve to add fuel to the fire.

The injured party may opt to continue putting up with such behavior because he or she has low self-esteem, doesn't want to be alone, or hopes their partner will change their ways sooner or later.

Or, they may decide to give him or her a taste of their own medicine, treating their partner like garbage in kind.

Another possibility is that they may resolve to end the relationship for good.

Nevertheless, being ignored, taken for granted, disrespected, or lied to gets old after a while. No one should be subject to that kind of behavior.

If one doesn't feel they're emotionally mature enough for a relationship, there's no reason to commit to one. It'll only lead to arguments, misunderstandings, and hurt feelings.

Relationships are not for the faint of heart. They involve hard work and sacrifice. There are going to be days where you will wonder how you managed to find someone so wonderful, and days that will put the relationship to the test and make you question whether you picked the right person.

At the end of the day, if a relationship is meant to be, neither partner will give up on the other -- no matter their flaws or shortcomings.

If it's not meant to be, however, it won't die on its own -- it'll perish because one or both partners put themselves before the good of the relationship.

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually. Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker. Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar. When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n

Misconceptions about quiet people

Earlier today, I came across a Facebook page that features motivational quotes intended to improve people's moods and enhance their overall self-esteem. Interestingly, I noticed two quotes that focus specifically on quiet people: "Be afraid of quiet people; they're the ones who actually think." "The quietest people have the loudest minds." I've observed that most people's views of quiet individuals can fall under one of two categories: 1. The ones who say quiet people are antisocial, suspicious, snobbish, and/or full of themselves. 2. The people who say their introspective nature and propensity to be deep in thought makes them smarter than their more garrulous peers. The quotes above speak to this mindset. As an introvert known to be quiet at work and at social functions where I might not know anyone, I feel I'm well positioned to dispel any inaccuracies surrounding quiet folks. First of all, the above statements misguidedly put

Understand People

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