The worst type of pain is not inflicted by the people we can't stand (i.e, our "enemies"), but by the people we care about the most.
For example, if you haven't been able to stand your boss from day one, the fact that he was a rude jerk today probably doesn't come as a surprise.
The same goes for meddling in-laws, the persistent bully at school, or the obnoxious neighbor who's never rubbed you the right way.
Yet, when our partner, trusted friend of 20 years, or doting relative does us wrong, it can be devastating. We might feel as though we've been hit by a train moving at breakneck speed.
Imagine finding out that your boyfriend has been cheating on you for years. Or that your closest friend has been spreading rumors about you to others within your circle. Or, picture discovering that your coworker has been taking credit for your ideas at work.
We never see this deception coming when it concerns people in whom we have placed our trust. Sadly, it happens more often than we think.
That's not to say that the relationship can't be fixed. Assuming the person provides a sincere apology and works hard to regain your trust, the relationship may very well be salvaged.
But let's face it. Chances are, the relationship will never go back to what it used to be.
There will always be that nagging thought in the back of your mind: "This individual could very well betray me again." You might find yourself on guard (and rightly so, as you want to avoid getting hurt again), and such behavior won't be lost on the other person, possibly stoking resentment in them ("Why won't you trust me? I already apologized!")
I've seen ample cases where the person who was let down gives the other a second chance, only to be let down again. It's a risk one takes that won't necessarily pay off.
Eventually, either the offended party or both may realize that the relationship is not worth maintaining anymore. One of the two may pull the plug outright, or it could just fizzle out.
Whatever the case may be, when someone we care deeply for shatters our trust, it can deal a serious blow to our mental and emotional well-being.
That's why they say that although people serve to enhance your life, when it's all said and done, the only person you can trust without a shadow of a doubt is yourself.
Comments