Some people, especially at the outset of the relationship, believe that if they give their partner all they want and never once object to anything they say or do, the relationship will be stronger in the end.
They fear that if they voice their true feelings and concerns, their partner will get upset and possibly dump them.
If one is that fearful of communicating openly with their significant other, they may have self-esteem and/or confidence issues to work through.
Why be intimidated by your partner? You should feel at ease to let him or her know when something rubs you the wrong way -- just as they should.
If your partner has a history of throwing fits whenever you express disagreement, it speaks to their character and should lead you to question whether you can reasonably remain in a relationship with someone so combustible.
As long as you drive your argument home tactfully and respectfully, standing up for yourself is actually an attractive characteristic in a partner -- and it is good for the relationship itself.
If you aren't upfront with your partner, how are they supposed to know how you're feeling? The longer they're in the dark, the longer it's going to take for them to do their part to improve the situation (provided they genuinely wish to).
Granted, this doesn't mean the points you raise will always be welcomed graciously -- at least not from the get go. But eventually your partner will be glad you took a stand and respect you more for it.
One should never feel afraid to convey that they disagree with their partner, and in a strong relationship they should feel at liberty to propose solutions to problems.
Of course, the key is to aim for balance. While being a doormat is unattractive, the other extreme -- being possessive and inflexible -- is equally unbecoming. If you're complaining about something different every day, you come off as a whining nitpicker.
Communication is an integral part of a relationship -- much like honesty, integrity, respect, and loyalty. A relationship devoid of this important element is one that's sure to meet its demise sooner or later.
Comments
Imagine never having played piano being asked in front of the Classic room to Go to the instrument and play. That's your learning environment
That is the underlying fear. And even in friendships years ago, if i would mention or do sth unfitting i d get punished or muted for aweek or two, which resulted in headaches and no other things aside. So even if not dumped fear of getting 'punished' and the hurt that goes with it were enough to remain in silence. I m not sure how this perception of social ...... changes with time for the last years it did not. Welcome to life :D
But this seems to be very local behavior, to not say anything and go out of the way. Guess it is learned behavior