Whether you're on a date or talking to a potential suitor online for the first time, the wrong person for you is the one who compels you to act in unnatural ways just so you can gain their approval.
Here are a few examples of ways we may project a phony representation of ourselves:
Here are a few examples of ways we may project a phony representation of ourselves:
- You try to be funnier or more sociable than you really are.
- You're dishonest about your past relationships, dreams, goals, and the like.
- You force yourself to like sushi, Harry Potter movies, or the Yankees just to impress him or her, even though none interest you at all.
In other words, you try to become someone you're not -- all for the sake of making a favorable impression on the other person.
But do you honestly want the person you end up with to feel drawn to the person they think you are -- or the person you really are? Why would you go such lengths for an individual who could walk away tomorrow?
That's just putting the relationship on shaky ground from the get go. Once your partner sees your true colors, do you really think they'll stick around?
It's just not worth it. No man or woman is worth that much trouble!
If you feel you have to alter your persona so drastically just so the person can like you more, you just haven't found the right one.
Granted, there's nothing wrong with exploring their interests and giving some of them a try. But if you have to turn your back on your own beliefs, values, and principles just to get in good with this individual, you're going down a dangerous road.
The fact you have to change so much should tell you something. Chances are, you and the other person are too different to be a good match.
It's not just about liking the same music, foods, and movies. If your future plans don't align when it comes to everything from marriage to starting a family, you're just not compatible.
When you've found the right person, you can be yourself around them without having to fake it. You'll know they're the one given the strong mental and emotional connection you share. They fit like a glove. They enhance your life like no one else.
If you have yet to find such a person, don't despair. It's better to wait longer for Mr. or Ms. Right than rush headlong into a relationship with someone who fails to appreciate you for who you are.
Never change for anyone. The right person wouldn't want you to anyway.
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