Why people always want things THEIR way

If it were up to most people, they would have it their way all the time. Why? It's simple: By and large, people want things to be as convenient for themselves as possible. They wish to expend as little time and effort on whatever (or whoever) brings them minimal to no gratification.

Even some of my closest friends are guilty of this. They want to be the ones to decide the places you meet at, the time of the day you call one another, and the kinds of activities you partake in together. Intractable and inflexible, such people make awfully poor negotiators because they don't know the meaning of meeting in the middle.

Unfortunately, these individuals fail to recognize that in order for relationships to thrive, both parties ought to be well-versed in the art of compromise. That's because relationships are about give and take, not just latter.

If time and time again you find yourself acceding to someone else's demands yet fail to ever see them do the same, it should make you question if the person is in the relationship for all the wrong reasons.

People who are this difficult may not even be worth keeping around. If you feel you literally have to beg someone to get a concession out of them -- whether it's to go to the restaurant you proposed or schedule a phone chat for a time that works well for you, you're likely dealing with someone who embodies the definition of selfishness. It's all about them, and they don't apologize for it.

If you're not willing to be flexible on occasion, your friendships and relationships won't last very long. One person shouldn't feel like they're the only one bending over backwards for the other.

While the other extreme is also bad -- always saying "yes" to everyone gives the impression they can just walk all over you -- relationships are about putting others' needs before your own at times.

Never let anyone think they can get away with always calling all the shots. Remind them that you have a voice as well -- your needs, schedule, and interests matter just as much as theirs.

Comments

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