Skip to main content

The only constant in relationships is THIS

Just like the only constant in life is change, the same can be said for relationships.

Can you point to a relationship in your life -- whether with a friend, your partner, or an old coworker -- that is exactly the same as when you first met the person?

Relationships evolve, just like the people in them. They go hand in hand.

Experiences and lifestyle changes lead to changes in both individuals, which in turn effects change in the relationship.

If that weren't so, we'd remain very close with every person we've called a friend. But we all know factors like distance, scheduling conflicts, our job, marriage, and kids can change the dynamics of a relationship.

It isn't always easy to swallow such changes, but that's what life is all about -- adapting to changing circumstances.

Sometimes people change for the better -- like when they give up smoking, become more helpful around the house, and so on.

In other cases, however, people can behave in ways detrimental to the relationship.

Right now, one of my friendships is on the brink of dissolving, thanks in large part to my friend's inability to remember he has friends once he enters into a new relationship. He left me high and dry before his last relationship went kaput. He then came crawling back, and I reluctantly gave him a second chance. This time, I won't be so generous.

You can't control what people will say or do. What you can control is how you react to such behavior. Once you've had enough, you can simply pull the plug.

The people you're closest to today may not be the same ones who celebrated with you at your wedding, or who will be there once you hit your retirement years.

How many of those who have gotten divorced ever thought there's was even the slightest chance they wouldn't spend the rest of their lives with their spouse? Probably not too many.

People serve a purpose in our lives, but that doesn't mean they're meant to stay in them forever -- nor does it imply that our bond with them will always be the same.

Indeed, embracing change -- in our lives, in our relationships -- is a pivotal and sometimes difficult part of the human experience.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually.  Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker.  Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar.  When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is  still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n

Misconceptions about quiet people

Earlier today, I came across a Facebook page that features motivational quotes intended to improve people's moods and enhance their overall self-esteem. Interestingly, I noticed two quotes that focus specifically on quiet people: "Be afraid of quiet people; they're the ones who actually think." "The quietest people have the loudest minds." I've observed that most people's views of quiet individuals can fall under one of two categories: 1. The ones who say quiet people are antisocial, suspicious, snobbish, and/or full of themselves. 2. The people who say their introspective nature and propensity to be deep in thought makes them smarter than their more garrulous peers. The quotes above speak to this mindset. As an introvert known to be quiet at work and at social functions where I might not know anyone, I feel I'm well positioned to dispel any inaccuracies surrounding quiet folks. First of all, the above statements misguidedly put