2 ways you can change someone

As I've said countless times, getting someone to change is often a futile effort. It's very difficult to change people's personality, beliefs or attitudes.

Not only are we naturally resistant to change, but being prodded into changing usually has the unintended effect of making people double down on the very behavior you're hoping to change.

If you want to stand any chance of changing someone, however, it can only be done in two ways: (1) opening one's heart and/or (2) opening one's mind.

In other words, you're more likely to get someone to change when you can appeal to their thoughts or their emotions.

It's for this reason that advertising can be so effective, especially ads of a negative nature. They not only lead us to rethink our positions, but they stir powerful emotions in us -- from sadness to regret.

Whether you want someone to become more respectful or less selfish, it usually starts with a heart-to-heart. Unfortunately, sometimes these escalate into all-out arguments.

Once cooler heads prevail, however, people are more apt to think about what you said and concede you were right. And the more powerfully you tap into their emotions -- say, you make them cry -- the more likely they'll change.

Do you agree?

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