Must-Read: How to Overcome Anger in Seconds

How many times have you gotten upset about something, only to realize once you've cooled off that it wasn't worth getting so worked up over?

We've all been there.

Human beings are highly emotional, volatile creatures. When we're having a bad day, it doesn't take much for us to fly off the handle. Even the slightest inconvenience or annoyance can set us off.

Today I want to share with you a quick and easy way to squelch that anger in a matter of seconds.

Ready?

Here it goes...

When you find yourself up in arms about you, take a deep breath and ask yourself a simple question:

Is this something that I'll be upset about a week from now? A month from now? A year from now? Five years from now?

I guarantee you that in nearly all cases, the answer will be no. You're merely caught in the moment and only thinking of the present, not the future.

Your spouse accidentally dropped and broke your favorite mug. Your co-worker spilled coffee on your desk. Your car isn't starting up. The neighbor's dog doesn't stop barking.

These are all things that can surely aggravate any person, but they're not, as people say, the end of the world. (However, if your partner breaks up with you or you get injured in a car accident, those are more serious circumstances whose effects you may still be reeling from years from now.)

The issue may be resolved in an hour if not a matter of seconds (e.g., clean desk, dog stops barking) but we don't always think clearly when we're so fired up. Anger gets in the way of rationalization.

If we simply stop to ask ourselves whether we're making mountains out of molehills, that alone can help us calm down and focus on resolving the issue rather than magnifying it.

So, next time you find yourself seething over something that seems a big deal at first, try this strategy out. You may just find you were giving it way too much importance.

Comments

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually. Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker. Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar. When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n

Misconceptions about quiet people

Earlier today, I came across a Facebook page that features motivational quotes intended to improve people's moods and enhance their overall self-esteem. Interestingly, I noticed two quotes that focus specifically on quiet people: "Be afraid of quiet people; they're the ones who actually think." "The quietest people have the loudest minds." I've observed that most people's views of quiet individuals can fall under one of two categories: 1. The ones who say quiet people are antisocial, suspicious, snobbish, and/or full of themselves. 2. The people who say their introspective nature and propensity to be deep in thought makes them smarter than their more garrulous peers. The quotes above speak to this mindset. As an introvert known to be quiet at work and at social functions where I might not know anyone, I feel I'm well positioned to dispel any inaccuracies surrounding quiet folks. First of all, the above statements misguidedly put

How to Understand People

Search This Blog