Here's why you shouldn't hide your talents

One mistake many people make is that they keep their talents a secret, whether they're natural talents or ones cultivated over time.

The possible reasons for this are quite simple: They either don't want to feel as though they're showing off, they aim to avoid the spotlight, or they're afraid of messing up while others are watching.

All of these are perfectly reasonable. The last thing I am is a show-off myself, and I am not a fan of drawing attention to myself in the least.

That's why, when I possess a talent I would like people to know about, I casually show them on a one-to-one basis.

For example, I type well over 100 words per minute. Two co-workers who sit near me got wind of it by hearing me type away at blazing speeds. (They didn't notice by actually watching me, as the cubicles are partitioned by walls.) Eventually, they each asked for an individual demonstration, and I was happy to provide it.

It isn't like I typed more slowly or quietly for fear of my talent being discovered. I just didn't want it to happen in a way that made me feel uncomfortable, e.g., the whole department congregating around me while I typed.

In high school, when my Business Applications teacher discovered how fast I could type, she immediately began preparing me for an annual competition that tests participants across the district in a given area of business, from finance to business law. She tried to persuade me into enrolling in the typing exam; however, at the behest of my accounting teacher, I wound up testing in accounting and winning fourth place, qualifying me for the state competition.

The bottom line is that while I didn't try to show off my skills in front of the teacher, I didn't necessarily try to hide them either. I still made my skills visible for all to see, hoping my teacher would eventually notice, and she did. Moreover, I had another business class that same year in which the teacher took notice of my typing skills and made a huge deal about them to the rest of the class, much more so than the first teacher I noted.

If you have an amazing talent and want people to know about it, you shouldn't try to keep it under wraps for fear of embarrassment or becoming the center of attention. Why not show it to people in private? Just be sure to tell them that you don't want them to go around spreading the word.

You never know. One of those people might know someone who knows someone who could really use your skills, potentially opening the door for job offers or other opportunities. Not only did my typing skills allow me to earn an aforementioned award -- something I noted proudly on my resume for years -- it has surely enhanced my job prospects.

Even if you decide to reserve those skills solely for hobbies, it's nice to receive compliments from other people ever once in a while.

Do you have any amazing talents? Has anyone discovered them, or do you keep them hidden?

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n...

Do you have Isolophilia? Find out...

You're probably asking yourself, "What in the world does Isolophilia mean?" It sounds like it would be something negative, doesn't it? After all, words that end in "philia" (e.g., pedophilia) tend to involve things we want nothing to do with. But Isolophilia isn't something all people deplore. In fact, introverts like me welcome it. Put simply, Isolophilia is defined as having a strong affinity for solitude. It describes a person who relishes being alone. While extroverts can only take so much solitude, we introverts find that it rejuvenates us. In order to recharge our batteries, we need to retreat to a quiet environment where we we're left alone to rest and/or gather our thoughts. Extroverts, on the other hand, become bored and drained when they're alone for a lengthy period of time. Social interaction is the fuel that drives them. So while an extrovert would probably do anything to avoid feelings of Isolophilia in most cases, an...

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually. Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker. Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar. When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca...

How To Understand People

Search This Blog