Skip to main content

Why many women are SKIPPING marriage

Studies show that far more women are skipping marriage today than was the case two, even three decades ago. Plus, what many women are saying on social media regarding the perils of tying the knot corroborates these findings.

This morning, I was sifting through posts on the Facebook page for Psychology Today. One of them posed an intriguing question: Do women these days still find great value in getting married?

Judging from the comments to the post, many of them do not. One woman stated plainly that after dating several non-committal men, she's grown tired of pushing marriage on these guys with nothing to show for it. Another said that she refuses to take the plunge again after being cheated on by two of her husbands. Still another admitted that she's never wanted to be tied down, instead valuing the flexibility of singlehood.

For many women, the perks of being married -- like additional tax and insurance benefits -- just aren't sufficient to offset the problems that a failing marriage might bring. This especially applies to those who are well off and don't need a man's income to help pay the bills.

Further souring women on marriage is another sobering reality: They initiate divorces far more than men do. And if children are in the picture, parents can become embroiled in a drawn-out custody and visitation battle.

Moreover, some women assert that marriage, even in this day and age, continues to lock couples into stereotypical gender roles. Many men expect their wives to be stay-at-home moms, at least until the kid reaches a certain age. What's more, women continue to shoulder the lion's share of household chores -- from cooking to cleaning.

Despite the overwhelming societal pressure to get married, some women are choosing to keep their options open. Even those who still wish to get married eventually are waiting longer to do so.

With the divorce rate hovering around 50 percent, I can't blame them for being cautious.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually.  Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker.  Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar.  When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is  still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n

Misconceptions about quiet people

Earlier today, I came across a Facebook page that features motivational quotes intended to improve people's moods and enhance their overall self-esteem. Interestingly, I noticed two quotes that focus specifically on quiet people: "Be afraid of quiet people; they're the ones who actually think." "The quietest people have the loudest minds." I've observed that most people's views of quiet individuals can fall under one of two categories: 1. The ones who say quiet people are antisocial, suspicious, snobbish, and/or full of themselves. 2. The people who say their introspective nature and propensity to be deep in thought makes them smarter than their more garrulous peers. The quotes above speak to this mindset. As an introvert known to be quiet at work and at social functions where I might not know anyone, I feel I'm well positioned to dispel any inaccuracies surrounding quiet folks. First of all, the above statements misguidedly put