Learn how people can be bad for your well being

Whether it’s a troublesome co-worker, jaded ex-girlfriend, or argumentative friend, we’re often around people who send our blood pressure shooting through the roof or push us to the brink of a nervous breakdown. For your health’s sake, however, it’d probably be best to avoid such an individual whenever possible and resolve to be in the presence of those who instead fill your life with positive energy.

At some point in our lives, we’ve all encountered a “bad egg” who makes our lives miserable.  Most of us have had at least one obnoxious co-worker who we’d love to give the finger to and shut out of our lives forever.  In my case, I’ve worked with supervisors and co-workers who bring their personal issues – say, their marital or financial woes – to the workplace and take their frustrations out on unsuspecting employees.

It goes without saying that these people are like an albatross hanging around your neck. And it isn’t as if we can simply cut ties with our boss or co-workers; we have no choice but to put up with them in order to keep our jobs and put food on the table. However, that doesn’t mean you should sit idly while someone treats you unjustly. Stand your ground, and if trying to defuse the situation on your own gets you nowhere, you might have to consult someone higher up in the chain of command. If the co-worker is talking smack about another employee and tries to reel you in for support, simply change the subject or find an excuse to walk away. Studies show that office politics not only adversely affect morale in the workplace, but they increase stress and lower self-esteem.

I also feel we should do our best to evade those who seem to find flaws in everyone but themselves. For instance, I know someone with a “holier than thou” attitude whereby she finds something to criticize about all those who cross her path – whether it’s their appearance or the fact they have a lot of money. This kind of attitude breeds negativity, which is disadvantageous to your overall well-being. What these individuals fail to do is look in the mirror and recognize their own shortcomings. After all, no human being is infallible. Why go around panning others behind their backs? Nothing good can come out of that!

Such situations played out quite frequently at school. We all remember the overweight kid who was the butt of fat jokes, the brainy girl who was labeled a nerd and prodded into letting others copy her homework, and the cheerleader who was disliked by virtually every other girl on campus. Such behavior often resulted in lower self-esteem and depression, which negatively impacted the kids’ grades.

Even those who purport to be our friends can sometimes act similarly. It’s okay for friends to offer constructive criticism, but when they seem to find fault with everything you do and say, that’s when you know the friendship might be on its last legs

The good news is that not everyone out there is intent on making your life miserable. Whether it’s at work, in school, or on the football team, there are usually a handful of genuinely good people who try in earnest to remain non-judgmental and keep their relationships harmonious. It’s these individuals we should aim to be around, though they may not always be easy to find.


Tammy Wade said...

Yes, you are correct it is hard to find healthy people to have in your life. That is really sad. The norm should be that people are good for you that are in your life. Not increasing your blood pressure.

How to Understand People said...

I'd like to think that there are still a few good people out there, Tammy. But they're few and far between -- that's for sure!