Before I hooked up with my now-wife, I got "friend-zoned" by a couple of girls. That was back when I knew little to nothing about how women think and what it takes for a man to draw them to him like magnets.
Here are some telltale signs that a woman has put a man in the dreaded friend zone:
- She hardly touches him
- She fends him off when he tries get affectionate (e.g. tries to kiss or put his arm around her)
- She talks to him about other guys and uses him as a shoulder to cry on
- She makes excuses for why she can't see or go out with him
- She leaves him hanging on a number of occasions
- Once she picks up on his advances, she ends phone conversations quicker, and his texts and phone calls go unanswered
- She calls him her buddy or brother
I think that when a woman is cognizant of a man's feelings for her and yet she continues to string him along, she is doing the unconscionable. A good friend will be upfront about how she feels and give him the option to pull the plug on the friendship if he feels a platonic one just isn't good enough.
Once a guy knows that she just doesn't see him as anything more than a friend, he should move on and look for someone else. Unfortunately, most guys in this situation don't think this way. They double down on their efforts to reel her in, which only leads to deeper feelings of anger, resentment, and despair. This, in turn, seriously jeopardizes the friendship.
There's someone for everyone out there. It's quite normal to be rejected by one or more people throughout our lives. Some of us wind up falling for our friends, never to see those feelings returned in kind.
I give all my friends this valuable piece of advice: Never give up on love. The right person will come along when you least expect it. To reach the promised land, though, you'll inevitably encounter a few bumps in the road.
Do you agree? Have you ever been in the friend zone before, or, put someone in it? Please share your comments on Google + or in the comments section of the blog.
For prior entries on this blog, please click here: How to Understand People