Have you noticed that when certain people prod you to do something or go somewhere you may have little interest in -- say, babysit for them or join them on a road trip -- they expect you to follow through, but when it's you making the plans, they suddenly feel they have the flexibility to duck out on you?
I've noticed a lot of people I know -- some close friends, even -- do this quite often. Double standard, anyone?
These people do to others what they don't want done to them -- a clear violation of the so-called Golden Rule.
What's most frustrating is that many of these people assure us it "won't happen again," and yet they never seem to kick the habit.
"Fool me once -- shame on you. Fool me twice -- shame on me."
If a person continues to leave you hanging, you really have two options:
(1) Tell him or her that if she doesn't start honoring commitments -- like you do for your friend -- you will cut the cord on the friendship. Make it clear that hypocrisy isn't going to fly.
(2) Accept that's just the way your friend is and feel free to be lax when it comes to arrangements the two of you make. Giving your friend a piece of his or her own medicine doesn't always seem like the most mature way to go about it, but you can't let anyone step on you and get away with it.
Have you been in this situation before? How did you deal with it?
For earlier posts, please click here: How to Understand People
I've noticed a lot of people I know -- some close friends, even -- do this quite often. Double standard, anyone?
These people do to others what they don't want done to them -- a clear violation of the so-called Golden Rule.
What's most frustrating is that many of these people assure us it "won't happen again," and yet they never seem to kick the habit.
"Fool me once -- shame on you. Fool me twice -- shame on me."
If a person continues to leave you hanging, you really have two options:
(1) Tell him or her that if she doesn't start honoring commitments -- like you do for your friend -- you will cut the cord on the friendship. Make it clear that hypocrisy isn't going to fly.
(2) Accept that's just the way your friend is and feel free to be lax when it comes to arrangements the two of you make. Giving your friend a piece of his or her own medicine doesn't always seem like the most mature way to go about it, but you can't let anyone step on you and get away with it.
Have you been in this situation before? How did you deal with it?
For earlier posts, please click here: How to Understand People
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