To be quite frank, I have to side with these frustrated men on this one. A lot of men do, indeed, become "whipped" -- they get into relationships and vanish without a trace shortly thereafter. This ends up seriously diluting the guy's friendships.
I've seen this transpire with a handful of guys I went to high school with, and I'm still attempting to wrap my head around it. Trying to make plans with them is an exercise in futility. They don't turn you down outright, but tend to flake out at the last minute, which I find to be even worse.
I've come to the conclusion that the guys most likely to exhibit this kind of behavior:
- Are newbies in the world of dating, and it happens to be their first real relationship
- Because it's their first relationship, they don't want to do or say anything to upset their girlfriends; as a result, they never develop the backbone to stand up to them
- Reason that it's better to lose friends than a girlfriend, as getting a girlfriend is much more difficult
- Will do anything not to risk losing the sex they're getting
Look, I get it. When men get into a relationship, they experience a tremendous high. Particularly in the honeymoon stage, men are walking around like entranced love puppies. The excitement of a new relationship seems nearly inextinguishable.
But what many men fail to realize is that a relationship can go up in flames at any point in time and for any reason. Who, then, will the guy lean on for support?
If the girlfriend is forcing the guy to ditch his friends or refuses to be flexible so he can squeeze his buddies into his schedule, then she just isn't a girl worth keeping. Chances are that he met a lot of those guys a long time before she came into the picture.
I realize that a relationship takes time and effort, and it's unrealistic to think that guys can devote as much time to their friends once they get serious with someone.
But why must some of these women try to control their boyfriends? Do they not realize that a man needs to spend some time with his friends in order to lead a balanced life?
But the men who allow these power trips are just as, if not more, guilty. I think that women ultimately will respect you more if you stand up for yourself in a respectful, if firm manner. If a woman knows she can control a man, she'll do everything in her power to manipulate him, thus causing his friendships to derail.
If a women truly cares about a man, she won't be so insecure as to prevent him from having fruitful friendships. We all need friends we can talk to and rely upon. Unfortunately, it isn't until the relationship goes down the drain that some men go crawling back to their friends. By then, though, the friends begin to sense that he is only using them for his convenience, causing them to go their own separate ways.
Have you ever been in a relationship with a possessive partner? Or has your partner been the possessive one?
Do you agree that a lot of women are guilty of doing this?
For previous entries, please click here: How to Understand People