Skip to main content

How to Understand Women: Why women dislike nice guys

Over the years, I've had countless men come to me seeking advice on how best to court women. There always seems to a common thread: They shower the women with gifts and compliments, but it yields little more than a "thank you" and -- if they're lucky -- a peck on the cheek.

Men, listen carefully. Stop what you're doing right now and sear this in your mind immediately: Women are GREAT at reading men, whereas we're flat-out lousy at picking up on the fairer sex's signals. (And you know it's true, guys. Don't deny it.) It's as though they have a special radar with which they can pin down a guy's motivations -- sometimes within seconds. Women are masters of subtlety, where men are terrible when it comes to keeping their feelings under wraps.

Men have to grasp once and for all that you can't buy a woman's affections. There's nothing wrong with giving gifts and compliments -- but, for goodness sake, do it sporadically. Why completely eradicate the element of mystery?

Women like to be kept on the edge of their seats in the early stages of dating. They like to wonder what you're up to and be given the opportunity to miss you. But you make that next to impossible if you're calling or texting her non-stop.

It may sound counterintuitive, but putting women on a pedestal can actually hinder a guy's chances of success. If anything, making her the center of your world makes her more inclined to take advantage of you. It's unfair, but it's the truth.

So what can you do?

My advice is to give her a little bit of everything. Be nice and romantic, but do it in small doses. Be unpredictable. Be funny. Don't be afraid to bust her chops sometimes. Stand up for yourself -- never be afraid to stand your ground. As long as you do it respectfully, you'll earn your lady's respect.

Nothing sends women running for the hills quicker than desperation. Don't be a pushover. Let her know that you have several hobbies to keep you occupied when she's not around. Women love a guy who demonstrates that, should she decide to enter into a relationship with him, she'll be enhancing his life, not completing it.

For all you ladies, do you agree?

Guys, do you act this way around women you're attracted to?

How to Understand People
How to Understand Women






Comments

Anonymous said…
I personally love nice, sweet guys.

A distinction needs to be made between "nice" and "desperate." Not all nice guys are desperate and not all desperate guys are nice; they are mutually exclusive traits and I have met men in both camps. I don't equate "nice" with "pushover" either. "Pushovers" tend to be either apathetic or spineless, neither of which are attractive, especially the former.

Desperate is a vibe the guy gives off about being needy and that vibe is not attractive to anybody.

Popular posts from this blog

This will spell the end of your relationship

When asked to think about the most common culprits for a relationship's going south, most people will point to cheating, complacency, and taking one's partner for granted. While these are all valid -- and documented in various posts on this blog -- there are certain habits on the part of partners that may not kill the relationship right away, but cause it to erode more gradually.  Among the most egregious of these is expecting your significant other to be perfect. They pick at your follies any chance they get. Nothing you do is ever good enough. In fact, you will never measure up to an ex, neighbor, or accomplished co-worker.  Perhaps this all sounds a bit familiar.  When you feel as though you're constantly being put under the microscope, it can inflict lasting damage on the relationship and your self-esteem. You're walking on eggshells all the time, praying you don't say or do something that's going to trigger your partner. This is no way to live, let alone ca

No response from someone IS a response

Make no mistake about it: When you don't get a response from someone -- whether they fail to answer your texts or return your phone calls -- it is  still a response, and a powerful one at that. When a person fails to respond, it's a direct reflection of their interest -- or lack thereof -- in the relationship. Few things are more aggravating than having to hound a partner, friend, or relative for some sort of reply after we've reached out to them. Yes, we get busy from time to time, but that doesn't give anyone the right to leave the other person hanging. A terse text with something like "Been busy, will reach out soon" doesn't say much, but at least it shows some effort to bring the other person up to speed on why they've fallen off the radar. Failing to provide a response for weeks -- if not months -- communicates that you are just not a priority, and that you'll have to wait your turn to get this individual's attention. This is n

Misconceptions about quiet people

Earlier today, I came across a Facebook page that features motivational quotes intended to improve people's moods and enhance their overall self-esteem. Interestingly, I noticed two quotes that focus specifically on quiet people: "Be afraid of quiet people; they're the ones who actually think." "The quietest people have the loudest minds." I've observed that most people's views of quiet individuals can fall under one of two categories: 1. The ones who say quiet people are antisocial, suspicious, snobbish, and/or full of themselves. 2. The people who say their introspective nature and propensity to be deep in thought makes them smarter than their more garrulous peers. The quotes above speak to this mindset. As an introvert known to be quiet at work and at social functions where I might not know anyone, I feel I'm well positioned to dispel any inaccuracies surrounding quiet folks. First of all, the above statements misguidedly put