THIS is one of the worst qualities one can have defines a narcissist as "a person who is overly self-involved, and often vain and selfish."

Other words associated with narcissism include:
  • Self-love
  • Self-admiration
  • Self-absorption
  • Self-obsession
  • Conceit
  • Self-centered
  • Self-regard
  • Egoism 
I don't take exception to people who are self-absorbed without showing off. It's when people have the impulse to voice -- loudly, I might add -- how great they are, how beautiful they are, how much better they are than anyone else. It's when people are so arrogant as to take credit for everything -- whether at work or elsewhere -- when they know full well that they received ample support from others. 

Selfishness isn't necessarily a bad thing. There's nothing wrong with turning down invitations from friends or family so that you can spend the evening alone, or treating yourself to a hearty lunch at a nice restaurant following a difficult week at work. Loving yourself is actually a key ingredient to a happy life, and being highly self-absorbed doesn't make you a rotten, heartless person.

However, when people feel the compulsion to come out and say "I'm the best" -- well, that really gets under my skin!

What's interesting is that people who act this way are really trying to overcompensate for something they consciously lack below the surface, whether self-confidence or self-esteem. 

You can love yourself without broadcasting it to the world. You can earn people's respect and admiration without being so pompous. 

I firmly believe that you can exude humility and help others while harboring a deep sense of love and admiration for yourself. Who says you can't pat others on the back while patting your own? 

1 comment:

Ema said...

The problem is that they are really, really cruel to other people