How To Understand People

Ever been in a relationship where you or your partner weren't wholly invested? I can bet that the relationship probably didn't survive.   Though difficult to discuss at times, the reasons why the partner isn't engaged should be openly communicated. Keeping those feelings bottled up will only breed further bitterness and animosity.  Otherwise, finger pointing and passing blaming will invariably ensue, potentially putting the relationship in serious trouble.  For a relationship to survive -- let alone thrive --it's either all hands on deck, or you can kiss the relationship goodbye.  It goes without saying that relationships are no walk in the park. In the worst cases, they can be emotionally draining, eating away at our happiness and well-being. And when a partner isn't fully committed, it isn't that hard to tell.  They withhold affection, are often combative, and prioritize their needs and wants over their partner's at every turn. When the other partner's...

When I was young and knew little to nothing about dating, I thought that pouring my heart and soul early on would somehow make the objection of my affection feel similarly toward me. Unfortunately, after a couple of failed attempts, I realized this approach was doing the exact opposite: repelling the girls and landing me in the dreaded friend zone.  Heaping compliments and gifts on someone not long after you've met them communicates -- often unwittingly -- that you're desperate.  Expressing such intense feelings right out of the gate not only puts a world of pressure on the other person, but it gives them little time to get to know you.  No one is going to be head over heels for someone who makes them their universe, who worships the ground they walk on, after only a few dates.  Understandably, they might question how you can be so smitten when you barely know them.  Chances are they won't buy it and will assume you're either trying to woo them into bed or use t...

The COVID-19 pandemic created ample time for couples to be around each other. Whether that's turned out to be good or bad depends on the individual couple, of course.  Being stuck at home presented plenty of opportunities for pairs to become closer -- or drift further apart than they already were.  Those working at home during the pandemic may have had to tend to kids attending school virtually or elderly parents. That juggling act may have translated into more stress -- whether physical, emotional, mental, financial, or all of the above -- leaving less time and energy for romance.  Those who may have been considering taking a vacation to disconnect from their daily troubles and reconnect with each other were now forced to hole up, potentially igniting arguments over, say, one partner's tendency to put off family trips for years.  Then there are those couples that used the extra time to strengthen their bonds -- by improving communication, trying out new things t...

A lot of us are constantly on the lookout for ways to boost our mental focus. But many of the suggested techniques for doing so -- like listening to classical music -- haven't been borne out by science.  However, research supports the claim that chewing gum -- yes, gum -- offers various cognitive benefits. The mint in gum increases blood flow to your brain, which in turn improves your memory. In fact, studies show that chewing a stick of gum can improve your short-term memory by as much as 35 percent. People performed better on math and verbal problems -- from repeating numbers backwards to solving complex logic puzzles -- and were about 10 percent more alert when chomping away. (It's important to note that after 20 minutes or so, the benefits of gum chewing essentially dissipated.) One reason may have to do with the fact that chewing mint or caffeinated gum has been shown to reduce sleepiness. Eat your heart out, coffee! A mood boost, too, may await you when you chew gum. One ...

Picture how painful it must be to see the person you love in the arms of another man or woman -- all because you took them for granted. Even though you claim to love them, you may have recognized a tad late that you just never showed it, at least not nearly as much as you should have. Countless people experience this painful reality each and every day, not knowing what they have until it has walked out the door for good. In order to avoid this fate, it's important that we not just talk the talk but walk the walk as well. It pays to spend occasional moments imagining yourself without them -- envisioning your significant other walking out the door, embracing another man or woman, and basically forgetting you ever existed.  While no relationship is perfect -- much like the people in them -- a failure to invest in it can gradually snowball into bitter arguments and corrosive resentment. Shutting off communication is akin to depriving a plant of the water, sunlight, and nutrients it nee...