It startles me that so many women continue sleeping with men in the hope that the guys will fall hopelessly in love with them, even after the men have expressed no interest in commitment.
These women have no one to blame for themselves once it becomes apparent that the men are using them only for sex.
Over the last couple of months, I've come across a few female friends in this very predicament. When asked why they slept with the guys knowing nothing more would come out of it, their replies have been real head scratchers:
- "I thought I could change him"
- "I couldn't help but get my emotions involved"
- "I was hoping the sex would turn into something more permanent and substantive"
- I felt close to him -- as if there were something deeper
What some women fail to understand is that many men have mastered the art of charming women under false pretenses -- with the sole aim of getting into their pants. Many men will go so far as to act like a woman's boyfriend without formally declaring himself as such.
He might take her out on dates to the movies, dinner, and so on -- everything a boyfriend would be expected to do -- but once he senses her getting too needy and emotionally invested, he might pull away, at least until he can lure her back into bed for another romp. In other words, they capitalize on a woman's feelings and vulnerability.
I can't say I speak from experience because, as a one-relationship-kind-of-guy, I have never done these things to women. But I do know a few men who have developed a penchant for this type of behavior.
Ladies, your best line of defense is to move on whenever a guy says he doesn't want anything serious. Take him at his word. Don't assume you'll be able to change him. By heeding this tip, you'll be sure to avoid plenty of heartache and frustration. Steer clear of commitmentphobes!
Have you ever slept with someone in the hope he would fall in love? How did that turn out for you?